Recovery!
Well it's taken me forever but I FINALLY recovered this blog! horray. I'll start posting again soon! Happy to be back! :)
The World through my Eyes, A Random Collection of Stories, Funnies, Photos and Art
Well it's taken me forever but I FINALLY recovered this blog! horray. I'll start posting again soon! Happy to be back! :)
Here are my brother and I when we were small, patiently waiting along side our driveway TRYING to sell water for 5 cents a glass. We weren't very successful that day, and I remember the few people that did walk by seemed to be very amused at our attempt to make a dime but politely declined the offer.
The family wheeled Grandma out on the lawn, in her wheelchair,where the activities for her 100th birthday were taking place. Grandma couldn't speak very well, but she could write notes when she needed to communicate. After a short time out on the lawn, Grandma started leaning off to the right, so some family members grabbed her, straightened her up, and stuffed pillows on her right. A short time later, she started leaning off to her left, so again family grabbed her and stuffed pillows on her left. Soon she started leaning forward, so the family members again grabbed her, then tied a pillowcase around her waist to hold her up. A nephew who arrived late came up to Grandma and said, "Hi,Grandma, you're looking good! How are they treating you?" Grandma took out her little notepad and slowly wrote a note to the nephew... "They won't let me fart."
Today at lunch time I am writing my College Placement Exam for Alberta College. I'm not worried per say but I am a little nervous about it. It's a full 3 hours and I've been out of school since 1991 and I can't say there's any way to prepare, so much has changed. One time, in grade 12... I smoked a J at lunch time then went and wrote the Social 30 mid term exam. I really didn't study and I was positive I would pretty much fail. I sat there and for the answers I didn't know I simply BS'd. And I aced it with 96%. Somehow, though, I'm pretty much sure I won't see Fat Jack at the smoking door at Alberta College offering me the enlightenment of the day.
I may need to fall back on my OTHER life experience and hope that all the things I've done so far have had some relevant purpose in bringing me to this place in time and will some way, some how benefit me on this exam. I don't know why I am fretting over it. I guess I just don't want to do poorly...I don't want to find out I really am stupid! I remembered doing fairly well in school, and I guess when seeing my transcripts recently- my memory aint so hot... because my marks weren't as good as I thought. I did buckle down for grade 12 but didn't end up writing my finals and finishing the year. Boo me!
Well I have the chance now, and my enlightenment comes from above now, so there is hope. I'm actually excited to get my High School and not just GED, and I'm REALLY even more excited to go to Grant McEwan afterwards. I think things are really starting to look good!
Fireworks at the Leg., I didn't get any good pics this year Canada Day was spent down at the legislature grounds with Craig and the fireworks were spectacular this year. The kids were with their dad for the long weekend so it was a really good break for all of us.
The next weekend was my birthday.
the kids at capitol Ex yesterday
Tylers' rendition of Van Goghs' Starry Night
Proud Tyler with the table and chair he made out of the deck we were destroying...
Shay checkin out grandmas camera
Craig came with me one day to cut moms grass, it was HOT that day!
At a remote monastery deep in the woods, the monks followed a rigid vow of silence. This vow could only be broken once a year on Christmas, by one monk, and the monk could speak only one sentence. One Christmas, Brother Thomas had his turn to speak and said, “I love the delightful mashed potatoes we have every year with the Christmas roast!” Then he sat down. Silence ensued for 365 days. The next Christmas, Brother Michael got his turn, and said, “I think the mashed potatoes are lumpy and I truly despise them!” Once again, silence ensued for 365 days. The following Christmas, Brother Paul rose and said, “I am fed up with this constant bickering!”
Caramba!
BUENOS DIAS!!!
JOU HABE YUST RECEIBED A MEHICAN BYRUS.
SIN WE NO HABE GOOD TECHNIOLOGICAL ADBANCES IN MEHICO, DEES IS A MANUAL BYRUS. PLEESE DELETE ALL JOUR FILES ON JOUR HARD-DRIVE JOURSELF AND SEND THEES E-MAIL TO EBERYONE JOU KNOW.
TANK JOU FOR HALPING ME. JULIO MANUEL JOSE RODRIGUEZ-GARCIA ----MEXICAN HACKER---
Two Indians and a Tennessee Hillbilly were walking through the woods. All of a sudden one of the Indians ran up a hill to the mouth of a small cave."Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!" he called into the cave and listened closely until he heard an answering, "Wooooo! Wooooo! Woooooo! He then tore off his clothes and ran into the cave. The Hillbilly was puzzled and asked the remaining Indian what it was all about. "Was the other Indian crazy or what?" The Indian replied "No, It is our custom during mating season when Indian men see cave, they holler 'Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!' into the opening. If they get an answer back, it means there's a beautiful squaw in there waiting for us." Just then they came upon another cave. The second Indian ran up to the cave, stopped, and hollered, "Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!" Immediately, there was the answer. "Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!" from deep inside. He also tore off his clothes and ran into the opening. The Hillbilly wandered around in the woods alone for a while, and then spied a third large cave. As he looked in amazement at the size of the huge opening, he was thinking, "Hoo, man! Look at the size of this cave! It is bigger than those the Indians found. There must be some really big, fine women in this cave!" He stood in front of the opening and hollered with all his might "Wooooo! Wooooo! Wooooo!" Like the others, he then heard an answering call, "WOOOOOOOOO, WOOOOOOOOO WOOOOOOOOO!" With a gleam in his eye and a smile on his face, he raced into the cave, tearing off his clothes as he ran. The following day, the headline of the local newspaper read .....NAKED HILLBILLY RUN OVER BY TRAIN!!!
A blonde female traffic cop stops a blonde for speeding "Can I see your licence? "The blonde rummages in her handbag. "I can't find it. What's it looks like?" "It's square and it's got your picture on it. "The blonde finds her mirror and peers into it. "Ah, here it is. "She gives it to the cop. She looks into it and says: "I didn't realise you were in the force, honey. You can go. Have a nice day."
ESTP -- Extraverted Sensing Thinking Perceiving-- The Adventurer Adventurous, dramatic, active... and sometimes reckless, ESTPs have a flair for fast-living. If they aren't leaping out of a plane, climbing a mounting or hacking a path through the jungle, they're likely be sulking in their living room wondering what they're going to do next. ESTPs are highly competitive and are always looking for a chink in an opponent's armor -- even when that opponent is a close friend. They're exciting, fun and full of life, exactly the kind of people who make you realize that there's always another goal to achieve, another trail to beat and another part of the world to be explored. While ESTPs can be tiring to be around, and their desire to always finish first can be irritating to some, their love of the dramatic usually makes them great company, their enthusiasm is infectious and their straight-talking attitude is always welcome. With more zest than a bag of lemons, ESTPs are full of life... and live for adventure. They're happiest when they're hanging from a cliff, snowboarding down a mountain or running in Pamplona. And then telling you about it.
Once upon a time there was a female brain cell which, by mistake, happened to end up in a man's head. She looked around nervously because it was all empty and quiet."Hello?" she cried, but no answer."Is there anyone here?" she cried a little louder, but still no answer. Now the female brain cell started to feel alone and scared and yelled at the top of her voice,"HELLO, IS THERE ANYONE HERE?"
I got the weirdest phone call the other day!
Apparently I left my mark on someone many years ago... Someone (a guy) I barely remember from my youth is trying to get a hold of me, because he has a friendship ring for me that he's been holding onto since he moved away in 1989. I would have been 16! I told the person just to say they couldn't get a hold of me when the guy called back because I don't even know what to think about it. That was like 18 years ago and sadly, I can't even place his face exactly. And for the life of me I don't even remember being more than an aquaintance. I guess he was only back in town for a few days, so he's probably gone already but honestly I'm a bit curious, but not sure if I should be flattered or worried. You know my luck with the freaky-deaks!
A few years ago I took a Career Desision Making Course in B.C and we were given access to this program that will match up your skills and intesests to a career that suits you.
According to a questionaire about my intesests, these are my top job matches.
Then I did another quiz about my skills and they told me which on the list below matches my intesests with the transferrable skills I already have. So these are my job matches: (the ones in purple are the top matches for skills)
1. Office Machine Repairer 2. Locksmith 3. Industrial Designer 4. Technical Writer 5. Website Designer 6. Interior Designer 7. Tilesetter 8. Exhibit Designer 9. Welder 10. Boilermaker 11. Desktop Publisher 12. Lobbyist 13. Sign Maker 14. Cabinetmaker 15. Security Systems Technician 16. Food Inspector 17. Immigration Officer 18. Fashion Designer 19. Potter 20. Craftsperson 21. Electronics Assembler 22. Animator 23. Model Maker 24. Jeweller 25. Cartoonist 26. Plumber 27. Electrician 28. Autobody Repairer 29. Criminologist 30. Pet Groomer 31. Sports Official 32. Multimedia Developer 33. Correctional Officer 34. Chef 35. Driving Instructor 36. Professor 37. Butcher 38. Cook 39. Elevator Installer and Repairer 40. Electronics RepairerWhat do you think I should do once I recover?
I had my follow up with the surgeon yesterday and he explained what happened with my back...
He said that the disc was very degenerated for my age and the disc itself had hardened & the disc space is very narrow. And the disc bulge wrapped up and over that bony part on the back of the spine and it was compressing my spine and nerves. (It probably looked more like the herniated disc in the picture above) That explains the hook like scar I have, too. He also said I have arthritis in my back, yikes, that makes me feel so old! Anyways, he also took more x-rays of my foot and recommended I wear a foot support for the next 6 weeks but everything is coming along fine. The hardest thing for me is to get my proper posture back, it's really hard because I'm still kinda hobbling on my foot. The underside still has a fairly tender black bruise and the top of my foot feels like it was crushed.
By the way, if you watched the UFC fight last weekend?? Well, the most recent one, where the guy got kicked in the face , and BAM instant KO!!! and he went straight down on his foot and it went the wrong way... well that's what happened to me!! I am sure, though I don't really remember the fall it would explain the big black bruise in my, uh, private personal area... and the bruise patterns on my foot also follow that theory. And how I landed. Anyways... I CRINGE every time I see a replay of that fight KO, it even hurts my foot to WATCH!! I feel for the guy. I wonder if he got a robo-boot too??
Beer is used by female sexual predators at parties and bars to persuade their male victims to go home and sleep with them. A woman needs only to get a guy to consume a few units of Beer and then simply ask him home for no strings attached sex.
Men are rendered helpless against this approach. After several beers, men will often succumb to the desires to sleep with horrific looking women whom they would never normally be attracted. After drinking beer, men often awaken with only hazy memories of exactly what happened to them the night before, often with just a vague feeling that "something bad" occurred. At other times these unfortunate men are swindled out of their life's savings in a familiar scam known as "a relationship."
In extreme cases, the female may even be shrewd enough to entrap the unsuspecting male into a longer term form of servitude and punishment referred to as "marriage."Men are much more susceptible to this scam; after beer is administered and sex is offered by the predatory females.
Please! Forward this warning to every male you know. If you fall victim to this "Beer" scam and the women administering it, there are male support groups where you can discuss the details of your shocking encounter with similarly victimized men. For the support group nearest you, just look up "Golf Courses" in the phone book.