Why Men Die Before Women...

This has been my week!!

eye candy for the soul

This is the cool watermark I designed for my artwork!

The Blind Walmart Clerk

A woman goes into Wal-Mart to buy a rod and reel for her grandson's birthday. She doesn't know which one to get so she just grabs one and goes over to the counter. A Wal-Mart associate is standing there wearing dark shades. She says, "Excuse me, sir. Can you tell me anything about this rod and reel?" He says, "Ma'am, I'm completely blind; but if you'll drop it on the counter, I can tell you everything you need to know about it from the sound it makes. She doesn't believe him but drops it on the counter anyway. He says, "That's a six-foot Shakespeare graphite rod with a Zebco404 reel and 10-LB. test line. It's a good all around combination and it's on sale this week for only $20.00." She says, "It's amazing that you can tell all that just by the sound of it dropping on the counter. I'll take it!" As she opens her purse, her credit card drops on the floor. "Oh, that sounds like a Master Card," he says. She bends down to pick it up and accidentally breaks wind. At first she is really embarrassed, but then realizes there is no way the blind clerk could tell it was she who tooted. Being blind, he wouldn't know that she was the only person around. The man rings up the sale and says, "That'll be $34.50 please." The woman is totally confused by this and asks, "Didn't you tell me it was on sale for $20.00? How did you get $34.50?" He replies, "Yes, Ma'am. The rod and reel is $20.00, but the Duck Call Is $11.00 and the Catfish Bait is $3.50."

The Redhead

A gorgeous young redhead goes into the doctor's office and says "My body hurts wherever I touch it." "Impossible!", says the doctor. "Show me." The redhead takes her finger, pushes on her left breast and screams, then she pushes her elbow and screams in even more agony. She pushes her knee and screams, then she pushes on her thigh and more screaming. Pushes her ankle, more screams and everywhere she touches it makes her scream. The doctor says, "You're not really a redhead are you?" "Well, no" she says, "I'm actually a blonde." "I thought so", the doctor says. "Your finger is broken."

My Favorite T-Shirt

You could just about say I have a collection of

really cool tees,but this is my ultimate favorite one. Besides being pink, nice and worn in,I love the design which is for

Pretty Kitty Pet Grooming.

Just a little something about me. :)

Aww

Old Man on a Bench An old man of ninety was sitting on a park bench crying. A policeman noticed this and asked him why he was crying."Well," says the old fellow, "I just got married to a twenty-five year old woman. Every morning she makes me a wonderful breakfast, and we have then have fun together laughing and relaxing. In the afternoon she makes me a wonderful lunch and then we make fun together laughing and relaxing again. At dinner time she makes me a wonderful supper and then we relax more and enjoy ourselves." The policeman looks at the old man and says, "You shouldn't be crying! You should be the happiest man in the world!"So the old man says, "I know! I'm crying because I don't remember where I live!"

...But the greatest of all is LOVE!!

Happy Valentines' Day!

Things that I love:

• Morning Kisses
• Amaretto Coffee
• Walking on the sunny side of the street
• A good book you can't put down
• Hugs from a child
• Color
• Pepsi
• "Garage" Clothes
• Ginger Beef
• PHOTOSHOP
• Creating a masterpiece of art
• Quiet
• Kickin a guys butt at pool
• Foo Fighters
• Choclairs chocolate bars
• Turtle Cookies

The list could go on but I won't bore you to death. Just an ode to the things in life that brings me happiness. (Besides my friends and family, of course!)

In other news, I am happy to say that I am working on a website for my Aunty and things are coming along. It's reassuring to know that I haven't lost all my brain cells over the past year and I can recollect and retain information I learned over a year ago. I will add a link to the website when I am done (hoping for April 1st by the latest)

And what would my blog be without a tale of some sort? It's been a long time.

One time I was coming home from a doctors appointment and I had to walk about 10 miles in the scorching BC heat. I made it about half way and decided to stop into A&W to get a cold drink. I was at the condiment table getting a straw and this creepy dirty homeless man started in my direction. I hoped that if I pretended not to see him that he wouldn't see me but he came over anyways and proceeded to put his face very close to my body, which made me a bit uncomfortable. I was about to look for a staff member when he leaned over really close and whispered, barely audible,

"You have no smell."

I shot back, bewildered,"WHAT?!"

"You have no smell", he exclaimed. "Most women have a SCENT, you have no smell."

"Well, thanks", I said, "I guess that could be a good thing."

Then I left, still a bit bewildered, all the rest of the way wondering if it was a good thing. At least he didn't say "HEY, YOU STINK, LADY".

I guess in the spirit of love, I love that I have all these stories about wierd people I encounter. Like the homeless prostitute who lived in the basement bathroom of the old Farmers Market and wanted to use my makeup because mine was "nicer", or Fargo Lady whos response to everything I say is "Ooooh, Yoh, Eehhhhhh?!" who I have yet to write about but I guess I could.

Well, Happy Valentines' to everyone,

To all I love who have love in their life, I hope you keep it forever and always. And for those who don't I hope this is your year to find it!

I feel so loved!!

It is nice to know that so many people have missed me in my absence! I know it's been a while... For a while I just didn't have anything noteworthy to write about. Then I just got kinda busy, then after that this computer was crashing on me so we needed some space from each other. I've been checking into some classes and can't decide whether I should go with school or work. It's a tough decision. I have been working on some flyers for my photo restorations and I am no longer Graphically Hip, but GraphiGirl! I'll have to post one up on this blog! I am also looking forward to a 7 day hiking trip for the first week of July. I get a 7 day all expense paid trip to hike and scale a mountain near Pemberton, BC. And I'll get to be there for my birthday. Yay me! Bring out the dancin banana! Other than that, not much else is new. I have to decide on the school/work issue very soon so I'll update on that next time! :)